5.23.2009

Choosing Path

Sometimes life up and throws a fork in your road and you find yourself unexpectedly having to chose a path. This past week and half was one of those times for me. An increase in pay at the day job brought forth my yearning for more workspace. With all the exciting things coming up in my life I had decided that I would look towards moving my studio at the end of summer. But then I came across this hook and grab heading in the artist's listings of Craigslist:
Attention Artists: Live / Work Space in Phinney Ridge!
Curiosity got the better of me and I responded to the ad. And then of course I fell in love. The house was a darling craftsman (they get me every time) with a HUGE built in workspace with a shop sink and tons of storage space in the basement. And it was located in one of my favorite Seattle neighborhoods with an easy commute into downtown. On top of that I really liked the housemate. AND on top of that there was a full time artist who worked from the attic. The energy of the house felt good and I felt that it was time - I was ready.
I agreed to move in and I left my first month's deposit.
All the while thinking that this place will be perfect to work in for the remainder of the year until Andy & I can get a place together.
So I had chosen my path and started walking down it. But then something happened to me. Throughout the week I started feeling more and more achy-stomach regret. I couldn't bring myself to tell anyone in my current household that I was moving.
I stopped sleeping.
Sometimes your heart and body have a much better clue than your head does. I thought I was ready... and it turns out I wasn't.

Yesterday I had to crush the excited expectation of a stranger I had already begun to care about. It was THE hardest phone call I have ever had to make.

I will be moving from the co-op soon - maybe even as soon as the end of summer. I came to the realization, along with Andy who had initially supported my move to the live/work house, that when I move it will be to finally join households with my best friend.

This is one of the more deeply personal blog posts I've written. Part of me just wanted to get it all off my chest - to let it go. And part of me wishes that my no-longer-future-housemate is reading this - just so I can say one more time just how sorry I am. I so wish I could have figured this all out 5 days sooner.
And the last reason is in hopes that maybe, just maybe... one of you readers out there has been seeking just such a live/work space. Have I got a super sweet spot just for you... Get in touch if you want to know more about the house that nearly snagged me.

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